Monday, August 13, 2012

What Does A Bully Look Like?







 Could you guess the three? Click on the picture to find the original link and answer.

When I first tried this I couldn't, perhaps I am not as smart as I think I am (how many of you just rubbed your eyes and re-read that). It's true, Pits are harder to spot than I thought, don't believe me? Here are two more games:

http://www.pickthepit.com/

http://www.pbrc.net/poppysplace/games/AdultFindabull/findpitbull_v4.html

Pits are considered "bully breeds" a term I truly dislike, but it begs the question "What does a bully look like?" Can you determine all you need to know based on looking at someone? Apparently some people do.

When I played this game I wondered what my students might draw if I asked them what a bad guy or a bully looks like. Would they sterotype? Would they draw specific acts or qualities? On the other hand what does a friend look like?
Here is what a friend looks like to me:



Imagine this scenario: A child sees a group of new students playing together and wanders over to them to play, because they look like they could be nice new friends. When he/she does the new 'friends' start yelling, screaming and throwing toys at him/her to get him/her to go away. The child is startled and scared and throws the pencil he/she is carrying at them then runs away. Who, if any, is the bully? More importantly who and how to you punish?

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I recently found a very noble cause: Save Izzy, a case that has striking similarties to the situation I have pictured above. A Great Pyrness, Izzy, was able to wander (not run) into her neighbors yard due to the fact her shock collar needed to be reset and for a short moment in time she was able to go farther than she had before (and who wouldn't adventure out). When she did she was met by screaming neighbors and hot coffee. After being doused by hot coffee she nipped the neighbor, who is now suing to put Izzy down. Whose the bully?

"Dan Olweus, creator of the Olweus Bullying Prevention Program, defines bullying in his book, Bullying at School: What We Know and What We Can Do to include three important components:
1. Bullying is aggressive behavior that involves unwanted, negative actions.
2. Bullying involves a pattern of behavior repeated over time.
3. Bullying involves an imbalance of power or strength."

Well lets break it down, Olweus stlye:

1. Was there an unwanted action? Yes there were two: one wandered onto someones yard and another involved throwing hot coffee. However, this a signficant distinction here, only one was an aggressive behavior (and it involved a hot liquid).

2. Was there a repeated pattern of behavior? In everything I have read this was the first time Izzy wandered into someone else's yard. In this case her electric collar needed to be reset and for a short period of time she was able to adventure out (and who wouldn't). So there is no repeated pattern of behavior and as we have already established this singular act alone was not aggressive. Although I don't know the neighbors history, I must say that it strikes me if someone's first reaction is to strike out (or throw) that this is aggressive behavior that has been learned/practiced from somewhere.

3. Is there a power differential? Yes, in the case the human had more power. A dog is voiceless, and insintical. The dog can't reason with them, literally, so already the people have more power. A Great Pyrness is a big dog, I know my brother owns one adorable GP Lacey, but regarless of how big they are the human is still physically bigger. Yelling, screaming, and physcially bigger there is a pwoer differential and it goes to the human.

Lastely, the use of a weapon. The weapon in this case was the coffee. I recently read an article about a dog that pulled all of her ten day old puppies to safety from a fire that started after a car bomb exploded in front of her home.
 

Dogs are instintical, they have a will to survive, and I ask you if your only defense against being burned was your teeth, what would stop you from biting?

In the case of the children  I would hope that you wouldn't tell the teacher that the child that who threw the pencil should be removed from class and his/her parents called about bullying.  If that seems like an absurd consequence it should, because it's absurd to me that Izzy is being asked to leave her home for being a bully.